by Ed Kang

我在抖音上收到很多回復，說我講的更像是“EQ英語”而不是領導力英語。說的沒錯，我完全可以自稱EQ英語。但我把注意力放在領導力上是有原因的。最重要的是，在說英語時使用EQ會馬上讓你成為更好的領導者。下面由我來詳細說明。

EQ是一項領導力技能

EQ是認知和管理自身和他人情緒的能力。這種能力對於領導者是必不可缺的。我們體驗到的所有經驗都會先由大腦的情感中心進行處理，因此情緒影響著我們所有的行為。許多人並不理解情感對自己的影響，是因為傳統教育總告訴我們要忽視或壓抑情緒，完全依靠理性和邏輯。

丹尼爾-戈爾曼

情商概念的第一個推廣者丹尼爾·戈爾曼提出了EQ的五大要素：

1。

自我認知

—— 認識與理解自身的情緒，情感和驅動力，以及這些如何影響他人。

2。

自我調節

—— 控制或疏導破壞性衝動和情緒的能力，也是延緩評判，先思後行的脾性。

3。

內在動機

—— 一種為內在的動力源，而不是金錢或地位而努力工作的激情。

4。

同理心

—— 理解他人情感組成的能力。

5。

社交技巧

—— 處理關係，建立人際網，尋求共識和融洽相處的能力。

顯然，每個領導者都會從學習這些EQ能力中獲益。但這和學英語又有什麼關係呢？

情商五要素

EQ提升交流能力

中國的英語學習者通常尋求最單刀直入的交流方式。但要想和英語國家的人進行商務對話，這種表達方式缺乏影響力。很多商務情境要求對話者言語得體，透過交談逐漸揣摩對方喜好。許多亞洲國家的人在一些話題上直白的表達方式會讓其他文化的人感到很不適應，甚至受到冒犯。

比如說，很多英語學習者會直接問：“你結婚了嗎？”對英語國家的人——尤其是女士——來說，這個問題是很尷尬的。類似的問題也包括“你今年多少歲？”領導者需要運用EQ，先透過間接的問題與對方拉近距離，使對方感到自在，再討論私人話題。

高情商的對話會讓對方不挑剔你的英語

來中國之後我和很多企業領導者有過對話。我發現當一名領導者能真的運用情商和同理心進行交流時，他們的英語能力就變得不再重要。我的注意力會完全投入到談話內容之中，而語法、詞彙或發音上的錯誤都無關緊要了。

在北美也是這樣。當非英語國家的職業人士能在談話中運用情商，從而顯示真正領導力時，語言就不再是障礙。他們總能和每個人建立強大的情感連線。

不論來自於何種文化，高情商者總會以別具一格的形式交流。如果你願意開放自我說高情商的英語，你就一定能成為中國乃至世界上極具影響力的領袖。

How EQ Improves Leadership & English

By Ed Kang

On Douyin， I often get comments saying what I teach should be called “EQ English” instead of Leadership English。 And no doubt， we could easily call it EQ English。 But there are some very good reasons we focus on leadership。 Most importantly， speaking English with EQ automatically makes you a better leader。 Let’s examine how。

EQ is a Leadership Skill

The simple definition of EQ is the ability to recognize and manage our emotions while helping others do the same。 Therefore， EQ is a very important skill for leaders to learn。 Emotions affect everything we do because our brains are designed to process all experiences through the emotional centers of the brain first。 Many do not realize how their emotions are affecting them because we are taught to ignore emotions and rely only on rational logic alone。

Daniel Goleman， who first made emotional intelligence popular， developed five components of EQ。 They are：

1。

Self-Awareness

– The ability to recognize and understand personal moods and emotions and drives， as well as their effect on others。

2。

Self-Regulation

– The ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods， and the propensity to suspend judgment and to think before acting。

3。

Internal Motivation

– A passion to work for internal reasons that go beyond money and status。

4。

Empathy

– The ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people。

5。

Social Skills

– Proficiency in managing relationships and building networks， and an ability to find common ground and build rapport。

It is obvious that every leader can benefit from learning EQ and the above components。 But how then does EQ relate to learning English？

EQ Improves Communication

It is common for Chinese English learners to look for the most direct way to communicate。 However， this is not always the most influential approach when speaking with native English professionals。 Sometimes a situation requires more tact and a period of “feeling things out” within the conversation。 In most Asian countries， people can be very blunt which can seem inappropriate or even offensive with other cultures。

For example， many English learners will simply ask， “Are you married？” This can be very awkward for native English speakers， especially women。 It is the same case with， “How old are you？” Instead， using EQ skills， the leader can ask other probing questions to make the person feel comfortable before sharing personal information。

Speak with EQ and People Will Not Care About Your English

I have spoken with dozens of leaders since arriving in China。 I can personally attest that when a leader speaks with genuine EQ， such as empathy， the fact that English is not their primary language becomes a complete non-issue。 I become so drawn into the conversation that errors in vocabulary， grammar and pronunciation are completely ignored。

The same occurs when I am in North America。 When non-English speaking professionals present themselves with a true leadership presence through EQ skills， language is no longer a barrier。 The emotional connection between everybody is far more powerful。

Regardless of nationality， people with high EQ speak differently。 If you are willing to be open and learn how to speak English with EQ， you will become a leader of influence in China and the rest of the world。